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Beast in Me

from 17​-​24 by bess hepner

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about

Beast in Me
Age 24
At age 22 I moved from Massachusetts to Seattle and faced anxiety and depression for the first time, reflected in the guitar and lyrics. This song also reflects losing your sense of home and feeling uprooted. The beginning contains a soundscape from my childhood home. The rest of the song contains sounds from Lincoln Park in Seattle. Now that I am out of this bout of depression and finding community, this song feels necessary to have written and recorded in order to get it out of my system.

Art: a photo of one of the first sunsets I saw in Seattle after a long, dark winter, the longest one of my life.

lyrics

Now the wind is dying I can hear my voice above the broken trees, a sound I didn’t know I had within the depths of me

And though I’ve climbed into the belly of the beast I couldn’t tell you least of what I saw before the blindness that I saw within me

And though I may be curious I’m overcome with loneliness
The fire that burns within my heart is fire that I no longer see

I could, I could be the beast you see in me and
I could, I could cry with more salt than the sea and
I could, I could be the fire that burns the trees and
I could, I could be the beast you couldn’t see

Now the wind is dying I can feel my roots grow deeper than the trees
I didn’t know that I could find home in this rainy breeze
(Find some home, find some home)

And oh the feeling of my mother’s hair
To miss a place no longer there
The smell of rosemary now is floating in the breeze

credits

from 17​-​24, released April 26, 2019
Album was recorded in 2019 by bess hepner at Rolling Crone Records (engineered by Doug Indrick and produced by Erika Lundahl) (rollingcronerecords.com) in Seattle. Mastered by Steve Turnidge at Ultraviolet Studios (www.arsdivina.com) in Seattle.

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bess hepner Seattle, Washington

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